Back in the day when I was still working, I thought it would be HEAVEN when I didn't have to get up every morning, paste on a smile, and drive with the other crazies through ice... and sleet... and snow.... and rain... and heat.... and humidity... (you get the picture) to go to work.
It wasn't that I didn't like my job. I LOVED what I did. I LOVED the peeps I worked with. and that's all I have to say about that.
The day came when my health caused an avalanche of issues that resulted in multiple doctors telling me that I MUST take some time off. I fought tooth and nail because, even though I complained about working... well, see paragraph 2. I was even cancelling dates with the girls as I just didn't feel well.
I was off for a while... then went back to work.
Unsuccessfully.
Off a longer period of time... tried working again. hmmm. I wanted to return to work. I didn't want to NOT work. But is was not going well and I was off work again. (with the doctors doing the "I told you so, I told you so" dance RE: Will and Grace).
Fast forward to being on medical leave for 2 years and still, no doctor wanting me to go back to work. <sigh> And DH was on the doctors' side too!
I decided that maybe I better listen. I hoped there was a plan for me. So I retired.
I whined and cried about my 'career' being taken away from me but, over time, I settled down and got kind of comfortable with resting when I was tired and while I never really felt great, I felt human most of the time.
To keep from going stir crazy during the adjustment period from working to retired, I went back to the sewing machine. I hadn't really felt much like quilting in a long time. But without the demands of a job, quilting was great!
I forced myself to do outside activities and schedule events to maintain a social life - but all the time still praying that I would feel up to doing them. As time goes on, my issues evened out a bit and I could better predict how my body would react to stimuli and just how much I could do without taxing it too much.
Today (not literally, of course), I have outside events to which I have committed and there is always light housework and yard work to do, plus I have more quilts on my 'want to do' list than I could do in a hundred lifetimes.
While I am a fairly happy girl, I feel like I am more busy than when I worked. How can that be? DH and I have even resorted to having a bi-monthly date night to make sure we share some quality time with each other. Whoda thunk?
I still have to cancel things now and then, but I am making it to most of my commitments. And while I miss the satisfaction I received when I was working and I miss the people I worked with, I have made some wonderful new friends because of this transition.... and I am smiling much more these days.
But I do seem to have a lot to do.... what happened to all that free time I thought I would have?
Give yourself permission to do what makes you happy.
Well you are certainly starting to look younger in your photos!
ReplyDeletethank you Brandi! You know that DH takes great care of me!
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