Never an Island...

Living in the Midwest for a half century, I have seen the pain, loss, fear, desperation, helplessness, and confusion resulting from the devastation caused by tornadoes, flooding, and fires many times in my lifetime.  I have helped how and when I could but at the end of the day, I admittedly could let it go and return home to a good night's rest in my own bed.   I was lucky through all these disasters; I did not lose a loved one, a home, a furbaby, or a cherished family heirloom.

In 1993, Des Moines, Iowa suffered wide spread flooding of the city and, ultimately, the failure of our water treatment plant...  but I had still avoided the brunt of a disaster.  There was water in the streets but I could still return to my home.  We had no flowing water for several days but I could still flush with rain water.   We did not have potable water for 10 days but plenty was trucked in to distribution sites and I could collect our allotted amount daily.  My basement had several inches of sewer water back up from over full storm drains and many things were ruined but I was still able to sleep in my own bed each night.  My employer sat up a satellite location to conduct business with not much more than a laptop and a pen but I had porta-potties, food, and drink.  We couldn't take showers in the heat of the Iowa summer but I was in a crowd of those in the same predicament. 

The community of Des Moines and its surrounding areas pulled together during the flood and worked toward our common goal.  Offers were posted by those that had wells or other water sources to do a load of laundry for you...   rides were shared...  couches were offered.... everyone shared what they had.... it was an amazing time, believe it or not.   We needed each other and we were there for each other.

After the flooding, I was more cognizant of the kind of help that victims needed after a disaster and I adjusted my "helping" and its timing to be more focused on practicality.   Physical limitations restricted me to certain activities but I was more aware of the right time and way to offer my assistance or help.   For example, I may have a washer and dryer to donate but if someone does not have a house, immediately after the disaster is not the time to be pushing a donation of furniture or appliances.  What they may need immediately is clean up supplies, child care, a place for a furbaby, temporary storage for what they can salvage, or place to sleep.

After the World Trade Center, I again adjusted my thinking and decided to take a few more risks and, hopefully, have fewer regrets about missing out on the knocking I would hear now and then at opportunity's door.   My first daring adventure was to go to Mardi Gras with little more than a couple days notice and ride with people who had nothing more than a friend in common with me.  I will never regret this choice and many of the others that followed.

I moved from the Midwest to...  lets say "less friendly" community and during the decade I lived there, I continued to help during disasters, donating quilts to local groups or families in need, offering assistance, checking on friends and acquaintances that were alone or ill, and trying to be a good deed doer when I could.  It was the right thing to do but it never felt right.  It just never really felt good like it used to.

An opportunity prompted me to buy a property at the foot of the Saint Catalina Mountains in Tucson.  The property and its view, for me, was of such peace, beauty, and awe - something my soul was desperately needing.   My settling in has been slow and there are still boxes everywhere and not much on the walls yet.  I have many reasons/excuses for my slow claiming of this new house but that is another story.

During my time in the Tucson, I have found myself in predicaments....  and needed some good deeds done for me (the reasons/excuses for the slowing settling in).  With much trepidation and fear of rejection, I reached out and asked for help.  My Tucson neighborhood has not ceased to amaze me with offers of assistance and even in the levels of assistance that were offered.  Someone actually assisted me in doing a good deed for someone else!

I feel at home...  its almost a "Des Moines-ish" kind of community feeling... and I am so very grateful for the odd collection of risks and opportunities that brought me to Tucson and allowed/forced me to get to know this community so quickly.

I, on the other hand, have been able to offer very little to others during their times of need but I feel that tide changing.   Once I get through this last bit of clean up of some personal garbage, I plan to resume offering what I can and I fully expect I will feel wonderful about sharing in this amazing community.

Yesterday, I received a report of a wildfire in the mountains above my home.   I am away from home helping a friend so there is not much I can do but watch and wonder... Will I be helping others in the aftermath or will they be helping me?

I pray that no one will need help with anything disaster related and the fire will be extinguished without loss of property or life.   But just in case, I think Tucson is the kind of place I want to be if disaster must happen.

Those self imposed rules and regulations

Its funny how our individual brains work and how we develop our own processes for solving problems.  Some people go directly for the endgame and some consider alternate options based on urgency, time, finances, skill, difficulty, etc.  I actually enjoy the challenge of finding a way to complete a project with things on hand, although I seldom manage it.  And, being a Libra, I must also add the "contemplation"  to my list of things to consider.

The functional reason for saving is that I will need it.
What makes it really fun is finding alternate uses for the stuff I've collected.  The explanation for the "alternate use" excitement is perhaps heredity.

Crisp and clean, white and bright

You would think I would run out of closets to paint, but nope....   

When I move into a house, there are a couple things I do as soon as possible. 

Cleaning the bathroom and kitchen are high on the list, of course, but the carpets and closets are extremely important for me to do soon after the health issues are addressed. 

Dull, drab, dark, and dreary

Nice, bright, white, and welcoming

#1 - CARPETS

I like to be as chemical free as possible but I want the carpets in a new-to-me home cleaned professionally.   After that, unless unavoidable, I like to use minimal chemicals and do them myself.

#2 - CLOSETS

Every single closet in my house will be painted a semi gloss white, two coats, before I put a single thing in them.

I usually find them scuffed and painted the same color as the closest room in an eggshell finish, or worse, flat paint.  I repaint them even if I don't plan to repaint the room for several reasons, and not one of those reasons is because  they smell like someone else's stinky shoes.

Upside:

• The closets will be as bright as possible because the white sheen reflects every ounce of light it can, making it easier to see things.  Its seldom that a closet has enough light.  
• The inside of the closet will always compliment/coordinate with the room paint, no matter what or how many times its repainted.
• Two coats of semi gloss allows for years and years of cleaning without wearing the paint off.
• I have yet to see a closet I've done this to that needed to be painted before I list a house.

Downside:

• Painting a pantry or closets with a lot of shelving is a maneuvering challenge and I get a bit sore if I do too much all at once.
• It slows the unpacking process.  I allow at least a week for thorough curing after second coat before putting things on shelves because, sometimes, semi gloss can remain a bit tacky for a while.  I do, however, go ahead and hang clothes in the painted closets a couple days after the second coat....  the shelves need the extra time to cure but the walls dry within a few hours... check your can.

As I do my round robin of first and second coats in the closets around the house, I can be painting rooms, cleaning, washing windows, unpacking the kitchen cabinets, bathrooms, arrange furniture, etc while the closets are either waiting to be painted or curing. 

My process is to start with the pantry and bathroom closets, first coat.  Then I may do a second coat on pantry and first coat on master closet, because I want my pantry as soon as possible and those shelves need extra drying time.   Next, maybe second coat on bathroom and first coat on second bedroom.   This order works for me but you will have to decide what closets are most important to you and start there.

I also put a sticky note inside the door with the date the second coat went on, just to help me remember.

I have never EVER been sorry I took the time to paint my closets before filling them.  It might slow the unpacking process but I have not seen many people empty a closet once its filled so whatever color it is, it stays.  I don't mind the color staying forever, I just want it to be white.

Note that the comparison photos were both taken at approximately the same time of the day with the hallway and interior light on.

No doubt, its a lot of work at an inconvenient time and, again, slows the unpacking process, but try one closet and see what you think.

If you must have one, enjoy it.

I've been collecting these for a while and posting on my "funnies" page. They are everywhere but I love the more cryptic.   To be honest, some have taken me much longer to decipher than others.

Please enjoy the more creative plates I've thus far been able to figure out.

A license plate is more than just a legal requirement:

On big expensive pickup:  IRS IOU
On a large SUV:  MUTLVR
From Arizona:  IMMELTN
From South Dakota:   BYBY SNO
On an old red pickup:  TONKA
On an SUV:  REDY2LV
On a Commercial Van:  BYMYXRY
On a Scion Cube:  MACHZRO *
On a Mini Cooper:  FAUXCAR
On a Honda Fit:   HISSY
On a zippy little car:  XQQQME *
On an impacted person's car:  H8KEMO
On a non-descript van:   EZ2SMIL
On a shiny new 'Vette: XLR8ION
On a frustrated commuter car: IH8I17 (I17 is our main interstate) *
On a brand new shiny Mustang:  MANOPOZ  *
In the doctor's parking lot: CUT2CUR
On a sporty compact: VRROOM
On a car with a loud sound system: R3DRCKR
On a small red car: IMNRTIS

The stars denote my personal "winners" for successfully joining all aspects of the situation in the most comedic way.

I will keep looking, keep deciphering, and keep adding because they still make me laugh.

And if you need help deciphering, I can provide you with what I came up with....  let me know...  or keep trying.

pepsi explosion

Ok, its finally funny.  I can finally talk about it....  and even giggle a little IF I imagine it happened to someone else.

I had brought groceries home and was just putting them away when I dropped a 2 liter bottle of Pepsi.  Not only did I drop it but it landed on my big toe. It should have hurt a lot because it fell upside down, meaning that the lid was what landed on my toe.  Yes, it should have hurt.  I am sure it should have hurt...  a lot.

But I can tell you in all honesty that I didn't even notice the pain.  Why, you ask? Because when the bottle's lid landed on my toe, it broke.

So why didn't it hurt?

Because the fall/broken lid/etc activated the carbonation. 

Remember that broken lid?  Combine that with carbonation and you end up with something that should be in a comic strip.

I watched wordlessly as the bottle spun in circles at my feet, spraying Pepsi around and around in an arc that drenched all four walls of my kitchen.   And because the Pepsi was under pressure, it didn't just spray everywhere, it sprayed into every crack, crevice, and opening four feet from the floor.  That means that the cabinet that was open while I was putting groceries away had Pepsi on the back wall and in and on every thing inside that cabinet.

And it didn't end there.   Because my house had the old fashioned registers that were mounted on the wall near the floor, Pepsi sprayed into the vent system....    and dripped onto the basement floor....   and ran down the vent about 6 feet from the register.  It even sprayed through the vent under the refrigerator and coated the motor.

And while it was spinning, it hit my legs, causing Pepsi to splash up onto my shirt and into my hair and on my glasses.

Hubby came running as soon as he heard the strange sounds.  Bless his heart that he had the good sense to not laugh....  at least not right away. Like I said, its been long enough that I can finally laugh  and ALMOST wished he was holding a video camera..... although I probably would have killed him  if he had.  I even think it would have been justified.

I can't tell you how long it took to clean everything up but I can assure you that post Pepsi, I had the cleanest kitchen in the state.

And yes, my toe did hurt...  a lot...  once the shock of the ballistic bottle of Pepsi passed.

truth in labeling.... in a full disclosure kind of way

I recently decided to jump on the bandwagon and make a few sets of the widely popular "microwave" bowls.  Per the internet:  

"These bowl-shaped pot holders are the perfect thing to stack next to the microwave to prevent burns and spills.  They're also great for watching television with a nice warm bowl of soup or chili.  

It is very important that you do not use anything except 100 percent cotton: cotton fabric, cotton batting, and cotton thread.  Polyester and other synthetics are apt to melt and can even start a fire if used in the microwave."  

So use everything 100% cotton.  Got it !!!  I have lots of scraps and batting that I plan to use for this project.   I verified:

     Fabric - Selvage says 100% cotton 

     Thread - Label says 100% cotton

     Batting - Description says 100% cotton

Yet I hear of them scorching.  again and again I hear this....  so I wonder....  

?? Did the makers not use 100% cotton?  they swear they did.   

?? Did the users overheat them?  Instructions say turn food after 2 minutes and no longer than 6 minutes total.  they swear they followed directions.

?? Did food or oil spatters on the bowls cause it?  Users swear the bowls were clean when used.

Being a Libra, and having other annoying character flaws affected by this type of situation, I needed to understand why there was scorching.   If everyone is doing everything correctly, how can there be scorching???

Settling down with a couple sleepy kittens on my lap, I wandered the internet looking for answers.  Unfortuntely, the kittens has plenty of time to nap.

What I THOUGHT I learned is that something claiming 100% may not be 100% - 100% cotton.  Does that make sense? No....  and I agree.  While the batting IS 100% cotton, as claimed, the scrim attached to the batting may not be.   

I went to look for up-close-and-personal answers....   and found some disturbing info.  Please be aware that I do not hold the box store that I used as a research site responsible for what I found....

If you look at the label on the front of the package or box of batting, you may see a claim of 100% cotton batting.... but when you look at the materials content (a section that looks like the tags on pillows) on the back or bottom, you may see poly content anywhere from 6% to 12%, based on the brands I reviewed.  

Frankly, I was, well, just a bit put-out about this.  

Ok. I was pissed.   For several reasons:   

1 - I can't use my batting scraps for this project.   Trust me this part was more upsetting than it sounds.

2 - How can they say 100% anything when its not 100% what they claim.  (I found a juice in the grocery store that claimed "100% fruit juice....  water added".   I understand that water was removed and is benign but it is NOT fruit juice and it WAS added.)  

3 - Will people receiving my bowls be reluctant to use them because they have heard of the scorching problem?

4 - Can I trust my research?

(see above reference to annoying character flaws....)  

Now we are down to my stubbornness.  My mind is somehow set in cement that I make these.  I feel confident that I found a reasonable culprit for the scorching.  

New review:

     Fabric - Selvage says 100% cotton AND it has been washed and dried without fabric softener

     Thread - Label says 100% cotton

     Batting - 100% cotton per all labels, references, and website information

Thus I will go forth and make microwave bowls from the batting I deemed acceptable based on my (soon-to-be-patented) 14-point batting label verification process and purchased.

WAIT.....  How do I really know that the thread is 100% cotton?  (eye rolling)

THINKING.....  NO claims of scorching at the thread lines.   We are good, right?

...  Going forth and making.     Stay tuned for photos!!!

Should I have a surgeon general's warning on my forehead?

Why, oh why do I let this stuff upset me?  Because I have already suffered my maximum capacity of incompetent clerks, phone operators, and strangers that pass in the night...  or day?  Because working in customer service type environments for so many years has lowered my tolerance level for inappropriateness, untruths, and laziness to just about ZERO?  

This is sounding like one of the soap box speeches already....

I want to know why society makes us believe that one of these is apparently ok to say* and one is considered rude and offensive, even if both are true from the standpoint of the speaker:

"Hello, beautiful!

"Ummm, you are kinda ugly."

Weeks ago, I binged a series on Netflix titled "the sixties".  I remember bits and pieces of a lot of its subject matter as it was happening but admittedly did not really understand any of it...  and I  apparently did not pick up the highlights of the sixties in school or during my years SINCE the sixties. 

I decided to further my Readers Digest version of "highlights of semi-recent history" by watching "the seventies" and "the eighties". Very enlightening.  Apparently, I was too busy at the time to understand the impact of what was going on around me and remained pretty much completely resistance to absorbing the impact what happened in those years when it was offered as a review of history.

The efforts, as referenced in the series, made to promote acceptance of congenital traits gave me pause.  I knew about them, yet I didn't.  When they were happening, I really didn't understand why they were needed and what they meant.  It seemed they made so much headway... until the next episode.

Yes, I was pretty protected from world events during my younger years and the disinterest of my parents in the issues of the day assured me that I need not be aware or concerned about what was happening on the other side of our front door.

So my life goes on while I digest and consider what I saw in the series....  I usually need time to consider and reflect before I really decide how I feel about things.  But even during my contemplation, it seems we are still fighting the same fights..  over and over...  never ending....

I play online games...   how else do I get my Scrabble fix?  Somehow, my game profile contains an old photo that I had posted somewhere and through internet magic, here it is.  I don't remember posting it anyplace that was game related but who knows...  maybe I did.  And as I think we all do, I had chosen the photo because I thought it reflected a somewhat complimentary version of me.  Who would post a photo of themselves after cleaning out a septic tank?

So it came...    a new game and a new chat comment from someone I did not know and had never played before..  I expected "Hi, thanks for playing", "nice play", or "no vowels here" or something game related...  No, I got "hello, beautiful".

  

I immediately thought "what the heck!"

It was probably innocent, right?  He is probably laughing at his joke....  or maybe be meant it.  Either way, why would he think that comment would be important to me?

"Hello, beautiful!"  My gut reaction was to respond with "Excuse me but you are ugly."  But I didn't.  Oh, how I wanted to... but I didn't.  Sarcasm could be considered a congenital trait, right?

True, the accompanying tone and facial that would be presented with these comments are vastly different, if one were able to actually see the speaker.  The "hello, beautiful" comment might be coming from a drooling, anxious man with a horrid combover who is looking to score...  umm, something...  a phone number?  some time ? conversation? a notch on his bedpost?   Guess what!  Hello would have worked WAY better.   I might have even answered!

The facial expressions with the "excuse me but you are ugly" comment would probably arrive with a bit of distance between you and a slight look of shock or distaste from someone who has not ever heard this comment directed to them, because if it did, they wouldn't be saying it to anyone else.  From this one, one walks away hurt and one walks away somehow proud of themselves.  Bad... nothing but bad.  But we all know there is no winner in this one.  One is a loser because he is a jerk and the other is a loser only if he thinks he is... only if he let someone influence his view of himself.

Either way, everyone is judging, or being judged.  What if one does not wish to be judged by their looks?   

True, I chose that particular photo.  Is it considered vanity if I don't choose an uncomplimentary photo to present to the world?   Did I set myself up to be judged?    Did I invite this judgement?    Am I letting his words alter my view of me or my world.

Consider the joke about men driving certain types of cars when they move into a certain age bracket.  The implication I get from the joke is that the car makes the man be, or feel, something that his is, at that point in his life, not or is no longer feeling.   The joke has, over the millions of times it has been uttered, become a judgment about any man that buys a certain type of car.  Unfortunately, not all cars are purchased for this reason.  Fortunately, some men that drive these cars are actually nice guys...  Thus, some are judged correctly and some incorrectly.  Bottom line, everyone is judging and being judged.

Is is humanly possible to avoid judging?  Obviously, being judged falls under the "its someone else's problem".  Should we allow those judging us to alter the view we have of ourselves?  what if they are correct?  I guess I must decide if I like myself, my attitudes, my life, and what I am doing with it.  If I listen to him, consider his words, and decide he is right based on actual facts, then I think its my responsibility to decide if that's who or what I want to be.  If I listen and decide he is wrong based on the reality of my life, I should maintain my course.  What I shouldn't do is let him tell me who he THINKS I am and then start being what he said.   

True, I listen when someone gives me a compliment I like. I am human that way.   But my fear has always been that if someone were attracted to, say, my fancy car....   and for whatever reason, I lost what they were attracted to:  the car, they way I can pull a cork out of a bottle... would they no longer be interested?  Would the thrill be gone, so to speak?

I pretty much regret that I am this cynical.  I would love to say that its not my fault.  I know for sure that I was not born this way.  If fact, that's one of the few things I know for sure:  Cynicism is NOT congenital.  It is result of experience.  And not just one experience.   Not even two experiences....

So here we are.  I now find myself somehow pitying those that are no longer in their twenties with their butts glued to a bar stool and a cigarette hanging out of their mouth, still using the "hello beautiful" line.  Is that they best they can do?  It feels so...  I don't know..  maybe desperate.  So after about five seconds of contemplating his opening line, I already feel sympathy for him.  

Thus, I judge him.  Because I feel he judged me,  I am suddenly the judger.   How did that little role reversal happen?  and so fast....  Maybe he was nervous.... instead of saying what he wanted to, "hello beautiful" just popped out....  or maybe the dog ate his dating notes.  Regardless, is it that hard to just say "HI"?  And I suppose, if you are that nervous, the conversation was probably not going to go all that well anyway.  Sorry.  Sorry I judged but see above reference to CYNICISM.   I continue to try to be uncynical....  is there a 12 step program for that?

In my humble opinion, compliments from strangers hold more weight if you offer one based on something over which I actually have some control.... like accomplishments, abilities. or strengths , or even the shoes I chose to wear.  The other option is to find someone else to try the "hello beautiful" on...  not me.

We all know that beauty is in the eye of the beholder....    But strangers shouldn't "be holding" me.

WOW, I am sounding old.   Or maybe I am sounding wise.  Probably intolerant.  A lot impatient.  Or maybe its just plain old fashioned cynicism.  

For those that are still paying attention: for future reference, opening a conversation with me by making a comment on my congenital traits, like "you are tall... did you play basketball", will be met with definite internal, and possibly external, eye rolling depending on my mood.  It MAY also get you a response such as "you are short... miniature golf?"  And if you keep going, I might suggest that you buy a sleek, fast, new car.  If you persist, I will ask you to do me a favor...  most likely, I hadn't tested my pepper spray for a while...  if you could be a dear and just step away from those other people, we will both see if its still active.

If you, as a stranger, want an adult conversation, make it a conversation. "Hello beautiful" will most likely get you a lot LESS than what you want.

If you are a friend, and you know who you are, go ahead and tell me I am grumpy and no one else in the world would complain about getting a compliment...  go ahead and say I am cynical I will tell you I don't care and we will have a glass of wine and laugh about all those life experiences that made us what we are.   I already know how you feel...  And you know how I feel...  no explanations are necessary. 

And as my friend, you can call me and open with "hello, beautiful".  I will laugh and say you forgot to include "young" and "smart".   Maybe compliments are not so bad...  most likely, its my attitude.

A photo from cousin's wedding....  I love this photo for every reason and no particular reason.

It only take a pinch of good to make a bunch better.

I am still fighting the fight.

So back to the series, "the sixties". 
And "the seventies". 
And "the eighties. 
And now today.....
Intolerance.  
Nothing much has changed, has it?  

* To clarify, I am talking about situations that occur outside work environment.